Oooh~~~I am a BASS

Well, I usually am a bass and I'd like to be a bass.
In a choir and a band, I am a bass.
In the real world, I am a bass, and this "bass" has two different meanings---One is the one I already am, and the other one is the one I would really WANT to be.
The bass is used for the foundation of a matter, and is very important but is lack of much public attention.
Yes, I am always quiet and do the background work and I'm proud of my modesty.
But after I enter the college, oh my god, I'm NEGLECTED.
In times that I can help, I want to earn the respect from others and be treated as a Bass1, which means that I will take the load and lead the whole thing in a specific direction and simultaneously, not really hold the superficial title until the title really needs me.
Now I'm going to be a real bass, which is a pretty nice thing, to control all the game but not to hurt or get hurt in many trivial things.

Fairness & Justice

Jouney to Hell!!!
Why people always seek the actions against evolution? Or in a modest term, why people always try to speed up the rate of evolution?
Including the idea of medicine and the foundation of fairness and justice, humans keep fight against the nature.
Nature favors the stronger, and in the nature LAWS, we should let it be just it should be.
However, being a human and a future doctor, I believe many will expect me to fight.
I really wonder if there are any other species on earth favors fighting against nature.
Look, Epola and AIDS appears to block our crazy actions.
Look, there is never a perfect way to treat everybody well and fairly in Jouney to Hell(maybe Journey of Life?).
Is fighting against evolution really a high-class shot?

We'll recieve more letters of challenge from heavon to hell, and from humans to gods.

Distances & Responsibilities

Being an adult should be a proud thing.
But it is not true.
When you finally grow up enough to be an adult, you are going to say goodbye forever to those fairy tale days.
Instead, you are facing a lot of heavy tasks, especially for the jobs I'll hold.
Actually, everyday I gotta face a bunch of problems about dealing with the distances for human relationship and the life-related responsibilities.
Yeah, I'm not REALLY old enough to face with the saving-life matters, but being a college student---especially a med one, I work hard but still don't get the essence of keeping the RIGHT distances with people around me.
Sometimes, I feel that I'm quite a popular hotshot.
But in most of the cases, I don't really get into the situation, which disables me to seek the pathway into human beings---I don't get WHAT THEY ARE THINKING ABOUT.
I make friends, but quite few real ones.
When I start to think about all this, I almost go nuts.
How close should we be? To what degree of alert should I keep?
What I should be careful for, others' interaction matters or the affections and trust for that person?
Maybe I never believe people, and I try to do the reverse.
I wish and I will get hurt some other time.
Everybody NEEDS to get hurt for some degree, so that he can live a relatively longer and happier life.
But here, I hope I don't get hurt from those close friends of mine, and this is not possible.
"I drew a line and wish that nobody will pass through, but that is only a minor wish not long before the day that people break through it."

Long Time No See

It's not because I want to show off my English, but because of some errors of keying in Chinese characters, I decided to post this article in English.
It's been long time since I last posted my article.
This is weird.
Now I am really a college student who is always busy handling some trivial things.
Sometimes I ask myself why I should choose this kind of life for myself.
I'm not afraid though, just a little buffled.
TO BE A DOCTER.
A holy job (or mission?) , right?
I agree.
And the worst part is, I'd LIKE to be a doctor.
I don't hate or regret anything I do now.
I'm just thinking......
My friends told me that I should do my best to enjoy the first two years in medical school, and I know it's true.
Enjoy!
It means I should enjoy anything I WANT to enjoy now.
Then I found...
I just want to do what a typical medical student do.
I feel ashamed of this actually.
Is this because I've lived a relatively steady life?
So I want to place an IF here:
Someday I suddenly want to try something new?
Would I have the courage to break down everything I already have?
Or I would just build up something new behind my mask of "success"?

Then I found something even more interesting in myself:
Sometimes you can't blame a criminal for the crime he commited, because he may be a criminal under some conditions that he cannot control or notice.

邪惡?瘋子?(La Mort de Belle摘錄修改)

邪惡的思想,不是甚麼妖魔鬼怪
而是每個人太過於傾向隨心所欲的一種生活型態
一種面對生命及其陷阱極危險的態度
或是對於某些慾望和誘惑的熱中與寬容

人們自覺信心滿滿又純潔無暇
感受到法律.正義的存在
但他們的心悅誠服的確是安分守己嗎?
為何要假裝自己沒有汙點也沒有缺點?
為了甚麼要維持這種搖搖欲墜的心安理得?

難道不是因為社會已面臨苟延殘喘的命運?
已經有人違法亂紀,遊走社會邊緣並藐視法律
這個人應該要找出來加以嚴懲
因為他是一個毀滅份子
但這個毀滅份子是該被毀滅的核心?
還是他是無辜的?
只是一種社會生命的突現?一種證明?

是人們自己
只是人們給自己設下的禁忌而已
可能有些事對自身或對別人來說會有不同的意義吧?
但若是沒了酒店和加油站
晚間在大馬路上需要用甚麼當作指標呢?

我深自相信,不只是許多
而是任何一種心智活動
都是一種疾病
------Fyodor Dostoyevsky

我不知道

我不知道
這一句話應該可以涵蓋我對大部分事物的反應吧
我絕不是在推卸
而是這句話
不僅是最簡單.最天真
也是最複雜.最深沉的一句話
最重要的是我OS最常有的口頭禪XD

我深深同意
有時候
生存在這個介於有序與混沌的奇妙世界中
實在有太多東西有很多種解釋
同時也有太多東西是無從評斷的

I'm Innavoig

不瞞您說

Innavoig 就是Giovanni 的鏡射

我一直很喜歡Hard Love小說裡的Giovanni

老實講,我還有點期待自己能有像他一樣的際遇

但很顯然的是,我的人生走到此,

我的17年成長過程(當然我老過17歲了)跟他的17年差的非常多

甚至有一些部分是完全相反

而且是我最不願承認的部分

Anyway

今天發生的事情

值得記上一筆:



我帶著沒有電的手機出門

坐上了與目的地反向的公車

然後在做過幾站後在搭上應該搭的方向的車班



再提一句:實在太值得一記了

整件事只消三句話就解決

結果我回家的路程和吃晚餐的時候

我的榆木疙瘩腦袋被敲到開花

原因很簡單

就因為擁有與Giovanni差不多性情的Innavoig

所擁有的家人與Giovanni恰恰相反



最後附上Giovanni名言:

I'm immune to emotions.

人是如何變頹廢的?

直到今天,我才發現部落格開張的大日子竟然就是七夕情人節耶?!
究竟是從什麼時候開始我不再留意時間的前進了?
在大考之前,我一直期盼著這個暑假到來,
並期許自己能夠[自強向上]充實自己,增補我少的可憐的常識資料庫
往日那個積極奮發的孩子到那兒去了?
我實在不大願意承認
這或許就是因為考試成績不上不下(或許更精確的說:是考的很不理想)
害我這整整十幾天的心情都平靜不下來---
雖然我一直都想盡辦法來娛樂自己:聽歌唱歌逛網路看影集讀無聊小說
但是我還是很明顯的感受到
我這雙走在懸崖邊的跛腳前後不穩的顛簸著步伐
踏在過往的沙塵中,腳印不斷被陣陣現實的強風一一刮走
等我終於在沉甸甸的夢魘中偶然仰起臉,回頭一看
居然發現那些我走過的時光已然消逝
我無法憶起那些我經歷過的片段
令人無法置信
我短短的人生就這樣浪費掉一段歲月---而且根本不知道是怎麼浪費掉的
或許就像哲學家說的
我太執著於習慣---以致於認為所經歷的一切太過平凡
但若是習慣,為什麼只有在考後這段時間才有感覺?
假設這十幾天為異常的狀況
又為什麼會讓我除了飄忽的頹廢感之外,完全不具備任何其他的情緒?
面對成績單的到來和填選志願的時間緊迫,我應該緊張,甚至憤怒或傷心
更應該歇斯底里
我卻發現,我感覺自己其實只不過是一個旁觀者
看著別人的成績單,看著著別人的電腦,看著別人思考自己的志願
事事都應該發生在我身上,卻又感到事事不干我的事!
為什麼??

開張大吉

我的第一個部落格終於開張囉(一陣掌聲/鞭炮聲)
這是我在指考結束之後頹廢暑假中所做的最有意義的一件事情阿
希望這個小小的網誌能成為我大學記憶中難忘的部分